By: Jade Bald; Posted: December 29, 2021

I self diagnosed myself when I was 24, in 2015 (the year I was turning 25) as my medical doctors were unhelpful. I did a number of tests and scans and all came back negative, thankfully. However, for a time I thought I was going nuts, but that soon changed. I researched my symptoms and initially thought it was MS, as the symptoms sounded the same, but then I did more digging and came across fibromyalgia. The symptoms matched like a t. 

I was plagued by: Unrestful sleep, all over pain, daytime fatigue, IBS-C, headaches, fibro fog, and painful periods. I’ve since developed tinnitus (which comes and goes) and non-allergic rhinitis. 

I’m still depressed, but that’s also because I’m unemployed (despite having a history degree) and I have no financial freedom as a result of this. I am a writer by trae, it’s one of my passions, along with fashion , social media, and crime studies. 

My dream would be to finally get that novel finished (I’m good at starting things but not at finishing) and get it published. I’d also love to have a popular blog, but it’s just so competitive in the blogosphere and besides I have so many interests, it’s hard to decide on one. 

In the meantime, I’ve settled on writing guest posts. I’ve been lucky to write for over twenty blogs and penned over forty articles in the past two years.

Being chronically ill does not help matters and fibro fog makes thinking and writing harder than it should be.

I also was anxious and depressed because this did not make sense. I was a formerly fit young person. I ate well and exercised. I was thin and never touched a beer, a cigarette, or a joint in my life. I never partied or otherwise abused my body. I was thankfully never in a big accident or caught a big virus. like Lyme disease. I’d taken some tumbles as a kid and in the winter on ice as a young adult, but none that forced me to have a cast or have bed rest.I didn’t have any childhood history of chronic health issues or a family disposition of genetic issues, either. 

It was a mystery, like the European mysteries I like to watch every now and again.

2019 rolled around. 

Early that year, I found out about the Highly Sensitive Person (HSP). It was after discovering I was an INFJ, on the MBTI (Myers-Briggs Type Indicator).

It all made sense. It explained my past. Why I had been dragging my feet when all the other kids seemed to be unfazed. Why I seemed to make everything more intense than it was. Why I had trouble sleeping. It didn’t help that due to my mom going back to school full time, we moved six times in ten years, between ages two and twelve.
 It was just a blur of houses, schools, and neighbourhoods. Not to mention I was bullied a lot….

I eventually didn’t want to make friends, because we’d just up and move. My mother was emotionally immature and parentified me and never tended to my emotional needs. However, it’s not surprising as she’s an Adult Child of Alcoholic ( ACOA). Her father was an alcoholic who psychologically and financially scarred her and her two siblings for life. 

Moreover, she split from my cheating dad when I was two and he died of a heart attack when I was three. There are two points on the Adverse Childhood Experiences score (ACEs) right there. His death prompted her to change her career path from geology to criminal law and as I mentioned above, we up and moved a lot, another disruptive thing in a child’s life. It’s not included in the ACE score, nor is bullying, but they should be. My poor body is reeling from the effects of complex trauma and childhood emotional neglect, borne out of being raised by a traumatized, emotionally immature parent. 

Self care, self compassion and stress management are the ways in which symptoms are dealt with. Getting a decent night’s sleep is also essential, as is connecting with others via social media and email whenever possible. 

Jade Bald is from Ontario, Canada. She is a graduate of Laurentian University, a rep for the Fibromyalgia Association of Canada  and a cat mom. She is a freelance writer as well, having written for blogs such as Tiny Buddha, Rebelle Society, and The Good Men Project. 
Her website is jadebaldwrtier.weebly.com
Pinterest: northernwriter
Twitter: jade_bald
Linkedin: Jade Bald